Monday, July 30, 2007

Second Meeting

A few days ago, I met my birth mother!

I apologize for not updating the blog more often but it is hard for me to write about it when I'm not even sure what I am feeling myself. The whole experience has finally settled into my conscious state of mind and is no longer an indescribable experience but something that holds great meaning to me. My birth mother was a little on the quiet side and I think that this was due to shock and embarrassment. I greatly respect her strength for coming to meet me and to face her past.

About an hour after we met, my birth mother called Mikyung and asked how I felt. She still wasn't home and was still crying. In addition, she explained how she was completely overwhelmed but I think that there could not have been any other reaction. Fortunately, in my case, I had about a year to prepare myself for the experience but she had only a few days when she was notified by SWS that I was in Korea to meet her.

Tomorrow I am meeting with her for a second time. I am so happy that it seems as though she wants to know more about me and that she is willing to open up her heart up to me. She seems to care about me a great deal. I care about her as well and even realized that I somehow loved her. How can I love someone I don't even know.

I love it that my parents and birthmother met. It was amazing and surreal that all of us were in the same room. I will never forget it.

- Jason

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Surprise Phone Call

We went to a traditional Korean Folk Village today with Jason's parents and the whole crew (Larkin just arrived a few days ago). And it was so much fun to see what old Korea was like, and the entire village was very impressive. We stayed there for about 4 hours, and my only regret was that the last bus departed at 5pm - I could have walked around for another hour.

On the bus ride back, I unexpectedly received a phone call directly from Jason's birth mother. This was the second time she had called me, and both times her voice was soft, timid, and also quite sad. It is a strange feeling for me to be speaking directly in Korean with Jason's birth mother, but also a very privileged feeling and an honor to be able to understand and talk with her. She expressed to me many things, and most importantly that she wanted to see Jason again this weekend, if she could make the time (she just gave birth very recently and has to take care of her young newborn). So I really hope that we will see her again, and that this second meeting will be filled with laughter and with less tears.

- Mikyung


Today I met my birthmother and my aunt at SWS in South Korea. I can't believe that it already happened. I have been waiting for over a year to meet her and have thought about this moment my entire life. It was extremely emotional but also strangely uplifting. I feel a certain kind of ease that I've never felt before and feel as though I have solved some sort of mystery about my life. I've never heard the saying / phrase "you look like your father or mother" or "we have the same face." Today I did. I think my birthmother was very overwhelmed and stunned by the meeting. It seemed to bring up a lot of feelings about her past that she seemed to have wanted to forget but I am impressed and touched that for me she was willing to come and meet me. In addition, my parents came and met her which was a very emotional event for everyone. All in all, I am thrilled and very happy that I was able to have the opportunity to meet her. This is and will be one of the most memorable days in my life. I will post more on this tomorrow...

- Jason

Friday, July 20, 2007

False Alarm

Today I was suppose to meet my birth mother but was cancelled last minute. She was not feeling well and went to the hospital. I think she is doing well but is clearly taking it hard. We rescheduled to meet next tuesday which is great but is definitely dissapointing that I didn't meet her considering that nearly 12 hours ago we would have met.

At first I was upset to hear this news but I feel okay about it now and understand that she has other things going on in her life and that she is going through a lot of emotions as well. I respect her privacy and just hope that she is taking care of herself and her newly born boy / my half brother. I want to meet her but of course only if this is what she wants to. I'm feeling every emotion about meeting my birth mother but am mainly excited.

Everything in Korea is going great! I could not be happier about the production aspect of the documentary,

Instead of my meeting with my birth mother, we went to a Korean middle school which was amazing to say the least. I have never experienced anything like it. I felt like a psuedo celebrity. I will post more about this later...

- Jason

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Meeting Birth Mother Tomorrow

I don't know what to think right now. I can barely concentrate on anything. It just hit me that in 10 hours I will be meeting my birth mother. Even with this project in mind, I never thought that I would be here right now in Korea about to meet her. I don't know what to expect but I feel as though I am ready for anything. I don't regret anything that I've done and especially not during this journey. As one section of the journey ends, another is about to open. I still don't think that I am comprehending the magnitude of this monumental occasion. I'm filled with excitement and both happiness and sadness. I'm hoping that my birthmother will shed light on my past and about her history as well as my birthfather and sister.

Bottom line: I'm happy to be here and am incredibly grateful to everyone who has made this journey possible!!!

Wish me luck...

- Jason

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Birth Family Update

It's hard to believe that we're in Korea and have already started to adjust into the culture. It hasn't hit me yet that we're here actually in production which Mikyung and I have been planning for nearly a year.

The chances of finding my birth parents are higher than ever. On July 6, 2007, my birthday my adoption agency found my birthfather and also received a letter from my birth mother indicating that she wants to meet me. The journey of finding my birth family has been long, frustrating, and yet still remains exciting. To know one's own family and blood is something many take for granted but is something that adoptees struggle with every day of their lives. With that said, I am extremely happy and excited to be here but can only imagine what the rest of the trip has in store for me.


Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Strange Good Fortune

I've been in Korea for a little over a week now. Came here to make sure that everything was all set for Production before the crew arrives, which is in a few hours time! I'm so excited to see Jason, AJ, Matt and John all here in Korea, and Larkin will be joining us soon in two weeks.

Two days ago I so randomly met one of Korea's most famous cinematographers, Sung Jong Moo who works with Kim Ki Duk, and most recently shot "Time" and "Breath". With him was another Cinematographer and an Executive Producer. I ended up having dinner and mak gul lee (Korean rice wine) with them for four hours. It was quite an unbelievable experience. They told me that if I ever needed any help with the documentary to give them a call. I hope they meant that, because I will be calling them!!

The chances of meeting Jason's birth mother is very good, which is so amazing for Jason and the documentary. He recently received a second letter and even photos of his birth mom and sister. I haven't seen the photos yet, and I can not wait to see the resemblence between them!!

Love in ThirdCat